Talked to my friend M. on the phone today. We talked about business for maybe half an hour, with good results. She has a skill I lack and is willing to apply some of it to getting more of my work sold. Gotta love someone like that.
And I was able to give her some advice about a situation she's in, so it wasn't all one way.
Sometimes, it's just good to talk with someone who gives a damn.
As mentioned before, M. is a close friend of R.B., with whom I spent the best years I've ever known. I fully intended to bring her up in the conversation, if only to see how she's doing these days.
M. beat me to it by getting into that subject first.
Because I instinctively trust M. and always have -- and because my emotions have been piled up behind a wall for more than five years -- I heard myself, to my horror, letting out the whole truth. I told her what I found good about R.B. and what bothered me about her (which, as it turns out, M. understands).
And I heard myself telling her more.
So now she knows and, in some limited way, I suspect R.B. will soon know, what I have not told anyone for all this time. Apart from the crawling-over-broken-glass-to-get-back-to-her bit, that is. M. will keep that to herself.
I intended to say more here, but the conversation drained me. I don't feel much like trying to sort it all out now.
Besides, I have to package up some samples of my work to mail off to M. and get it to the post office before 5:00.
That's as good an excuse as any for ending this entry.
9 hours ago