Thursday, August 23, 2007

There is a word for people like me...

...or, to be more precise, there are two words.

Dumb shit.

This applies particularly to my reaction to a suggestion made by a friend today. I was moaning about something unfortunate that happened, and he said "well, you can do something about that."

He has some standing in saying so. He has "done something about that" in his own town, and has done it well.

Never mind that he has a nice wife who is supportive of his every move, has three jobs, two of which pay for the third. He has actually taken the plunge to do something I consider difficult for anyone on my side of millionaire-dom.

And he told me, in concise terms, how I might do the same.

If anything, taking on this task would not make me wealthy. I might pull in survival income from it at best. And it would take all my time and then some.

It certainly wouldn't increase my desirability to the opposite sex. If anything, it would brand me as more of a weirdo than I seem now.

So why do I even give his suggestion a moment's thought, much less feel like beginning the process of seeing if I can make it happen?

Two answers: One is that I believe in the goal. The second is that if I am going to be condemned to play the role of village idiot, I might as well try to be a conspicuous village idiot, one who actually tries to do something worthwhile.

I'm not saying what it is, because it would be too embarrassing to start getting the "you-poor-fool" reactions before I even start trying to make it work.

As I told him, I have a long, long track record with lost causes. I "think big," go for the brass ring even though experience has taught me my arms are too short to actually grab it.

It's the one last cheap thrill on the way to the cemetery, and since nothing else has worked, I might as well give it a shot. It involves tasks I'm fairly good at -- mostly mindless chores -- and a fair amount of BS, which I also have demonstrated a proficiency for.

And maybe -- just maybe -- it is the one thing I might actually succeed in completing.

Since talking to him, I've already made a tentative start. In two or three years, I may even have accomplished something.

If not, what have I lost? Nothing. I have nothing left to lose.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

go for it!! you know my thoughts... it doesn't help to sit around and just mope in self pity, you have to proove to yourself something, anything! You are so good at what you do and it's such a pity that it gets wasted.

Even if it doesn't work out, you can at least then say you tried.... {{{hugs}}}

John0 Juanderlust said...

If you believe in the goal, and want to do it, then it will help change all else.
Women are attracted to a happy idiot more than to an unhappy safety man. Happier in what you are doing at any rate.
Got me curious now. I've been happiest in my life when I was pursuing what most thought was nuts.

Anonymous said...

Oh no, not Amway??!! :D

In all seriousness:
Good Luck Scribbs, go for it!

Anonymous said...

The fact that your friend successfully did "it", whatever "it" is, proves it's do-able. And I totally agree with giving "it" a try. You're a very principled guy, and I can just imagine the good that will come of your successful mastering of "it".

You're killing me here, Scribbs. What is "it"? You running for office? Mayor? Congress? Hablo Espanol? :)

Anonymous said...

Regardless as to how you see yourself most of us DON'T! you dear sir are your own worst enemy and I know you are very accomplished. It is not your fault that people take forever to pay you. Go for it- you need a break.
Lou

Anonymous said...

"It certainly wouldn't increase my desirability to the opposite sex. If anything, it would brand me as more of a weirdo than I seem now."

You're freakin' cracking me up Scrib!

Whatever it is, at least you'll be out there meeting new people instead of waiting by the mailbox. Maybe you'll meet the future Mrs. Scrib along the way.

Anonymous said...

Oh come on! What is it!

Generally if you are doing something, you meet other people who are doing it. for better or worse!

Go for it!

Anonymous said...

I take my eye off you for one minute...... ;)