Missing person.

That would be Mr Optimistic: Heavy-set* dude with glasses, gray beard and graying hair, last seen heading off to a photo session with D. the photographer.

He was seen this morning, taking a neighbor to the doctor, and returned from that jaunt in a perfectly reasonable frame of mind.

Later, he was overheard talking to D. prior to departure, asking questions ("have you picked a location?" "Do you know what kind of photos you want to take?") and getting what appeared to be unsatisfactory answers. He was last seen walking out the door after assembling a package of cleaning supplies -- D. never brings them -- and muttering about spending his afternoon making no money to help someone else make a fair chunk of change in just a few hours.

His last words: "I freekin' knew it was gonna be like this...."

PARENTHETICAL GHOST-WRITER'S NOTE: Since Mr Optimistic ain't here I, Mr Grouchy & Cynical, am posting on his behalf.

Hard to say where Mr O might be. After 21 years of acquaintance with D., he's surely not beating the living bejeebers out of the hapless photog while howling obscenities. Nor, having been adamant about Cleaning Up His Act, is he lurking down at The Spot (or June's Place) guzzling cheap beers.

Wish he'd get back here. An email came in that might bring a small smile to his no-doubt anger-contorted face.

And there are those 24 bottles of primo Mexican Coca-Cola waiting, not to mention the possibility of a post-concert call from his friend R. back in Massachusetts. I know he wants to hear all about that.

Mr Grouchy & Cynical, over and out....

* Say "lard-ass" and, while possibly accurate, you'll make him get very salty indeed....