Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Off...

...to Las Vegas.

Yeah, I'm really looking forward to this. Uh-huh. I'm grateful it's a short gig and I'll be back here tomorrow night.

I used to dig Vegas, but that was in the days when it was a sea of tasteless neon and over-the-top architecture, mobsters and plain old cheesiness. Can't forget the cheap drinks and cut-price prime rib dinners, either.

I do my gambling with life, so the slots and tables don't hold much appeal for me. My sole big, wild gaming spree there started with $40.00 and ended with $0.00. I got up to almost $150 at one point. Big whoopee, right? Mr Out-of-control Gambler, here.

This is a work trip, anyway. There'll be good meals, and a lavish free bar -- right at a time when I'm trying to eat less and drink less. And a lot of stuff I'll have to pay attention to and make notes about.

But hey, I'm being comped like a real high-roller.

I had hoped my next excursion to Vegas would entail a quick trip to the Elvis Wedding Chapel. No such luck.

PARENTHETICAL JOKE: You know the old story...boy to girl: "hey, let's go to Vegas and get married, or something." Girl to boy: "let's go to Vegas and get married or nothing."

Insert rim shot here...


Yeah, I'm brushing up on bad gags in case I get tapped to emcee a show...you never know when Tom Jones is gonna need a front man....

In the words of an old friend: "Tom Jones? Is he still dead?"

I've always thought Vegas was the real-life proof of the adage about sh*t rolling downhill. Mainly, it panders to impulses I don't have. And the impulses I do have that could be temporarily sated there wouldn't satisfy me anyway. I pay for it with my heart, not money.

PARENTHETICAL THOUGHT: This leads to a discussion I won't get into here. Enough said.

Never mind. I have to go, now.

Hope all y'all have fun while I'm gone. Have a little for me.

6 comments:

lowandslow said...

Hey, at least the "comp" part sounds good. I hope there are some cool cars involved in this trip. :)

likeisaid said...

I've never been to Vegas. Paul went before we were married but he never took me for some reason...

Have a wonderful time!!

lovezao said...

Get some pics for us!
Enjoy your trip...

Birdie said...

you should have contacted Pimp-Daddy2 !! he's the no. 1 JS Las Vegas insider!
have a great trip! remember, we had hoped to go there together last year! oh, well....

John said...

Avoid the pitfalls of sin city. We may have to work on the routine if you front fro Tom Jones, or Elvis.
ofly

John said...

I haven't heard any big Las Vegas news like "man holding city hostage", so I guess you kept a low profile.
Hope you had a good drive each way

harpofly