Mexicans love their "telenovelas"...

...but the very best of these Spanish-language soap operas is playing out, live and in full color, right here in Los Angeles.

It began a couple of weeks ago when our mayor, Antonio "We clean your toilets!" Villaraigosa held a news conference to announce that he and the Mrs were going to split up. Oddly enough, no one complained that she stayed with the kids in the official mayor's residence while he went back to their previous digs.

Not long after, it came out that Antonio was in a "long-term" affair with someone. One of the reports showed up instantly on KVEA, the local Telemundo station, courtesy of anchor Mirthala Salinas.

What Senorita Salinas failed to mention was that she was the one playing drop-the-burrito with Villaraigosa.

The element that makes this story so amusing is the tone of the reactions. The Los Angeles Times, which has never met a Hispanic politicians whose ass they wouldn't kiss, has taken no editorial notice, though they do have one of their star columnists following the story while they figure out what to do.

In a way, I feel sorry for the Times. They just had to force themselves to suggest that city attorney Rocky Delgadillo should resign after committing a host of legal indiscretions. That was bad enough; do they now have to diss the mayor? Can they possibly deal with bad-rapping two Hispanic politicians in one week?

More amusing is the "community" reaction. The Great Thinkers are worrying about the effect Antonio's inability to keep his zipper closed will have on "Mexican politicians."

Come on, people. Did JFK or Bubba Clinton mess it up for other white politicos just because they weren't above getting some from women other than their wives?

I didn't vote for Rocky or Antonio, but knowing that the first is a scofflaw and the second is led around by his procreative unit doesn't change my opinions of them. To me, both were clearly incompetent (as both have proven to be) and that trumps everything else in the voting booth.

But the real fun begins when the reactions go beyond the political. Women -- especially Hispanic women -- are heavily into the "Antonio's such a dog" trip, and aren't shy about saying so. How could he do this to the wife and kids (the kids he made with the wife and well, others)?

If you really want to get to the nut of it, Antonio may be a dog but, like all dogs, he needs a bitch to do his doggy thing with.

And Ms Salinas, who is not difficult to look at, is no blushing schoolgirl in a communion dress. She has previously been hooked up with Fabian Nunez -- a big-shot in Sacramento these days -- and at least one other Mexican (I'm leaving off the "-American" suffix because they are more interested in catering to Mexicans than Americans) political figure.

She's just climbing the ladder....

I don't have any moral judgments to make -- except for a couple relating to my own past experiences -- and don't really care if Antonio is scoring the entire Laker Girls squad or getting advice on how to deal with satyriasis.

I feel sorry for his wife but, by all indications, she knew what she was getting. The wonder is that she put up with it for 20 years.

I don't feel anything for Mirthala Salinas. I've known women like her. She simply got caught in the spotlight, while most of them keep on doing their thing unnoticed.

Actually, I feel sorry for the citizens of Los Angeles. Villaraigosa hasn't done a damn thing for them since he took office and, with this new distraction, is unlikely to actually get productive.

At least we can all stay tuned for the next episode of Antonio y Mirthala: the Telenovela. The plot gets new twists by the day and, except for our tax dollars (not) at work, it's all free.