Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Stopped.

As I was waking from a night of strange (but detailed) dreams, a voice was saying "you can't do it."

And the voice was right. When things get extra-rough, it is difficult enough to make an effort to put things together; having pre-holiday "holidays" interfere is one problem too many.

Everyone I need to talk to has taken today off, it seems.

The thought has become the deed. I can do nothing, and it is not a good feeling.

That brings me to my rant about Thanksgiving: Like everyone else, I've been bombarded with the usual propaganda. You know what I mean: "Be thankful and give to those who have less. Remember that you have loved ones, friends, a good home and a bountiful table, football games on TV in the afternoon, blah blah blah...." And of course since you have all those things, give.

If I was enjoying any of these things on Thanksgiving, do you think I'd be ungrateful?

Just as one can always find people who have it better, those who have it worse can also be found.

It's not that I don't care. Given my -- shall we say -- limited resources, I still try to give to the "less fortunate" when I can. I do sense their pain, and am affected by it.

And if -- or when -- my situation improves, you can bet I won't forget. But damn, when the arrogant professional do-gooders get on my case about how it only takes $1.34 (or whatever) to feed some homeless person a Thanksgiving dinner at the [insert name here] Shelter so I should whip out my wallet, do they ever stop to think that much of my lavish feed for the day will have come from the 99-Cent Store?

I remember the people who have helped me. I always will. There haven't been many, but their unselfish kindness and concern is truly unforgettable. And it will be returned and, with luck, spread around as well.

In the meantime, my situation is quite dreadful enough, thank you very much. I need to find out how -- and, I hope, find a little help and/or cooperation along the way -- to improve it. A Thanksgiving like the one the guilt-trippers describe would do me just fine. I'd ease up on the bounty (I've never liked over-eating or wasted food) and delete the football games, though.

When I get there, ask me again to care about those who have it worse. I'll do all I can to help.

4 comments:

Birdie said...

I've been thinking a lot about you lately. No, I won't try to give you any smart-ass advice. I just want you to know there are a lot of people thinking about you and who are worried about you....
Now, grab your camera and go start taking kitty pictures again.... {hugs}

lowandslow said...

Ditto what D said. You have many friends who think the world of you. Kelly and I are sending you our best wishes.

John said...

What I'd like to know is where these people get all that food for $1.34 or raise a kid with "only $7 a month". I feel foolish, like I'm shopping at all the wrong stores. Hell, I'd pay for me and the kid both and we can each be taken care of for $7 / month per person. I considered driving down to the homeless spread they are putting on. How do they determine who is homeless? Oh yea. I was going to do it from the receiving end, just to see how it is. Maybe my fears of that are unfounded. I'm bad. I know.

John said...

By the way, I know it wasn't meant for fun, but I really liked the imagery and thought of Bing dropping by with egg nog. That would be the cat's pajamas.