To know, as so many of you are once again showing, that there is love and hope in the world, and some of it is reserved for me, is both a positive and sorrowful experience for me.
Positive is easy to explain. I have fallen, and badly, and a multitude of hands have reached out to me.
Sorrowful because I cannot help but feel a failure. My own mistakes -- and there have been many -- poke at me like red-hot wires. Granted, it couldn't have managed to fall so far without the neglect, lack of honor and sometimes outright enmity of others, but at times like this I am acutely conscious of having just plain screwed up.
So many have rushed to my side. One ran away, and that is cause for sorrow too, though I cannot blame that person, who is undergoing severe trials right now as well.
PARENTHETICAL I-TAKE-GOOD-ADVICE UPDATE: The "donation" link over in the right-hand column is fixed. Though it no longer says so, it goes through PayPal. Thanks, Wizardress!
To those who are trying to cheer me up and deliver encouragement, I say: it's working.