Reason #72,867 why...

...I am convinced we should put all elected officials on a ship -- liberally (oops! bad word!) stocked with food and booze, of course -- and send them off on a 20-year cruise to Somewhere Else:

California Assemblyman Lloyd Levine has introduced a bill to ban the sale of incandescent light bulbs -- the most common light bulbs in the world -— in the state by 2012. Appropriately enough, his bill is called the How Many Legislators Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb Act.

There are two ways to look at this: either Mr Levine is a raving loon who needs to have a tranquilizer dart shot into his flank or, worse, he is sincere.

In the interests of full disclosure, I must tell you hate fluorescent lights with a passion that borders on hysteria. Not only does their light make most people look like they should be stretched out on a coroner's slab, but they flicker at a frequency that aggravates a strange eye condition I have suffered from since birth.

But Mr Levine is convinced that changing over to fluorescent lights will reduce energy consumption and thus slow the onset of the Dreaded Global Warming.

As dey say in Noo Yawk: Skrooom.

If we are serious about cutting back on misused energy, let's cut the power lines to Sacramento. And Washington, D.C., while we're at it. Do that, and the rest of us can go hog-wild with our electricity use and there will still be a major decrease in consumption.

Yes, I understand why the rancheros in government don't have the huevos to deal with the things that would really make the biggest difference in the environment if they're so freekin' worried that the ice caps are about to melt. They can't do that, because it would upset their buddies who keep their campaign funds full and will give them cushy no-show jobs when they are finally yanked out of office.

You know, basic stuff: get Al Gore out of his 20,000 square-foot house and off those private jets he uses to go around the world whining about "greenhouse gases." Make politicos junk their SUVs and ride around in electric golf carts. Shut down the Government Printing Office, which I suspect uses up something like one forest a week to keep it in paper. Close down the UN. In other words, useful things.

Me? I have to go out and stock up on 100-watt Soft Whites now.