I knew it was coming...

...and, sure enough, the computer-generated telephone voice advised me that I need to show up at Long Beach Superior Court at 7:45 tomorrow morning.

I know, I know, it's my "duty as a citizen" or some such highly devoted noise. I'll get that speech at the court.

But I don't wanna do it.

Either I'll waste a day sitting in what is only slightly more comfortable than a holding cell and get sent home unchosen, or will end up on some eight-month "trial of the century." Either one, simply put, sucks.

There is one trial for which I'd cheerfully volunteer to be on the jury. According to a local TV station, a certain L.A. city council-person's (mine!) office hired members of a street gang called the Grape Street Crips as "gang-intervention specialists" and paid them with city (taxpayer) money. One of these worthy gangbangers is now in jail on, apparently, rape and assault charges.

What's worse, this particular gentleman complained to the city that he was being "harassed" in the course of his meritorious service and, as a result, two police officers got transferred and reprimanded. He also had highly confidential LAPD documents in his possession when arrested, and these, allegedly, came from an identifiable city employee.

Now I wouldn't dare suggest that my very own city council person-ette would ever stoop so low as to pull a dimwitted (and, in my view, resignation-worthy) stunt like hiring gangbangers to run an anti-gang program. The mayor might, though. He's the one howling (en Espanol) for millions of additional dollars to fight (with "intervention," bribes and -- I suspect -- city jobs) gangs, which are said to have 40,000 members in the city.

But no arrests have been made of the responsible elected criminals officials yet. They'll get away with this. Again.

And they'll be busy tomorrow while I'm sitting in that damned jury room. Tomorrow is, of course, May 1, which is the big communist/labor union holiday. In solidarity with every strange fringe group they could rope in, various illegal-alien enabler groups are sponsoring yet another "day without a Mexican" full of demonstrations, marches and speeches to show all us citizens and legal residents why we should simply throw the borders open and let everyone come pouring in. Mayor "we clean your toilets!" Villaraigosa will surely show up; there will be TV cameras, after all.

And tomorrow night, there will be "anti-discrimination" protests against city laws banning taco trucks from dispensing their wares unrestricted. I suppose we'll hear mobile air horns blaring "La Cucaracha" all night....

At least traffic ought to be light on the way to the courthouse tomorrow.